Random

The new phone.... I'm going to be a texting machine!

Hmmm... what can I get into?
Start 'er up, I've got places to go!

Right into a tree...
I'll just pull it out instead of using reverse!

Working

Nothing new to report... been very busy with the business and trying to work full time as well. I like to say I have three full time jobs.... the job I get paid for, the 'business' and being a mom. It's certainly taking it toll on all of us at our house. I know I'm feeling guilty about not spending enough time with Colton and just being at home. Hopefully one job will come to an end within the next few months. It's my light at the end of the tunnel and I hope all of this work will pay off in the end.

Happy Birthday

Today would have been Champ's 11th Birthday.... Happy Birthday, Champers. We miss you & not a day has gone by where you're not in our thoughts and wish you were here.

SOLD

Our house is sold... we're just waiting for the pre-approval letter and an official purchase agreement. While this is exciting news, it's bittersweet. We have so many wonderful memories at that house... it's first house we bought together, bringing Colton home, playing with the dogs, 4-wheeling and having two of our precious dogs go on to their next life all in the short 3 1/2 years we've lived here. We like to think Champ played a part in getting it sold. We haven't had anyone interested in it for months and Sunday the couple looked at it and last night they came back and gave us on offer. I think sort of Champ's way of telling us he's moved on and so can we... he wanted to be at the farm for as long as he could and made us stay until it was time.

So thank you, Champ.... just another sign we know you're watching over us. You've been gone a week exactly this morning and it's still hard to believe. I cry for you everyone morning... You made us better people. You taught me how to love and be loved in a special way I never knew. Part of me feels no matter what I write, I could never put into words or convey to others what an amazing dog you were... I cannot do you justice in words, Champ and I wish I could. Only Chuck and I know in our hearts just how special you were and you don't realize the impact you had on our lives. You and your 'dad' had a special bond... as he says, he could look in you eyes and know what you were thinking and you knew what he was thinking when you looked into his. You were one of a kind and we miss you terribly, Champers. This place on the farm, will always be your home....

Thank you to whoever for listening to my thoughts and feelings... part of me feels like they're just too private to share and it makes me feel terribly vulnerable and the other part says it's ok to let it all out there. So... thank you.

Good Times

Hilary

Not all sad events happened last weekend. My oldest friend, Stacy was home from California for the week and I got to spend a few evenings with her. Wednesday we went for a few drinks in West Fargo and reminisced about school days. Saturday I meet her down in Milnor for a small party for Hilary who will be getting married in September and was home from Colorado. It was a really fun time and I enjoyed getting away, even for a little bit. Sunday evening her parents hosted a barbecue and Colton and I went out to Gardner for a short time. It was a beautiful evening and she was able to see Cole... wish I would have taken some pictures. Last weekend was filled with sadness and happiness and it helped having too much to do and not enough time to do it in.

This is for you... Champ

May 2008

Best Friends

Champ's last hunting season 2006.
Don't cry because it's over.

Smile because it happened.

-Theodor Geisel

Reality didn't set in until Chuck made it through the door with just Champ's collar in hand... but no Champ. While these last few days have been hard, it's been nice to look at pictures and talk about all the memories we had with him. We realized there wasn't one person who had met Champ, that didn't love him and think he wasn't the greatest dog and Chuck is so very proud of that. Champ was 'his' and he was Champ's... We miss his eyes... those gentle brown eyes that could melt your heart. I miss seeing him coming up the side walk, with his tail wagging so hard his butt shook. Chuck sees him in every place in the yard... every place we look there's a memory we have of him. I told Chuck how lucky he was to help bring him in the world and how lucky he was to help him pass away. Chuck somehow knew he wouldn't live to be terribly old..... he's said that since I've known him. I got almost 7 wonderful years, Chuck had 11 years he wouldn't trade for anything... he would have been 11 on July 22. Life at home just isn't the same.... Chuck is taking it really hard and he's hurting terribly, which hurts me to see.... Champ was Chuck's best friend. I'm doing better than I thought, I have my moments where I think of him and just lose it, but I'm at peace knowing Champ is well again and watching over us and that makes me happy....

He's had been on my mind constantly for the last 2 months since we found out he was sick. I found myself these last 2 weeks or so, terribly worried he wasn't downstairs, that somehow he was still outside and alone. I would check on him 4-5 times in the evening before I went to bed, making sure he was still down there and every time I would go down there I would pet him and tell him how much I loved him. I did it the night before he died. I went down there right before I went to bed making sure he was ok. We had a terrible wind storm that night and a large tree beside the garage fell down. As I put Champ on the lead that morning, I saw the tree. I think the falling of the tree was a sign from God... something large in our life is falling and would make us fall to our knees. Chuck made a comment that the yard doesn't look the same... just as with the tree, life without Champ is not the same.

Chuck wonders if we didn't do this soon enough, that we let him suffer for too long... I don't want any regrets. We tried and we loved and we will always remember. He will be the dog we compare every other one to. I think people who aren't dog lovers, think we're crazy for being this upset... we really truly love everyone of our dogs like they are a part of the family.

I came home last night and pulled up in the drive way and I usually count... 1, 2,3,4... only there wasn't 4 to count in the kennel, and as I'm doing this I'm opening up a card from the vet. I was expecting just a 'sorry for you loss card', but inside the card they had a piece of paper with a stamped print of Champ's paw... and I just lost it...

We'll have an autopsy done just find out for sure what was wrong with him. The vet thought he might have had liver cancer, too because of the ulcers in his mouth and the fact the fluid in his lungs never subsided even on the pills he was on. We'll have his ashes spread out west in the fall where Chuck goes hunting... their favorite place together and we'll bring Raven with, too who left us 2 years ago July 7. It's a place she never had a chance to go to while alive, but would have loved also.

Chuck is planning on getting a tattoo of Champ on his chest on the right side... the side he was always on. Chuck decided it'll be a picture we have of him, with the sun setting behind and possibly a pheasant in the background as well. It'll say 'Gone But Never Forgotten' on the top and 'Champion' written along the bottom. I thought he should get a tattoo over his heart of the paw print the vet gave us... he just might.

While this post was meant to be short, it just couldn't be. There's just too much to say and so much more I could write... So, this is for you Champ.... while we want you back in the worst way, I know you'll always be with us... we'll take care of your girl, and she'll make you proud this fall. We will always remember and we know how incredibly lucky we were to have you in our lives and call you our dog. WE LOVE YOU, CHAMP. From a card we received from a friend... God needs good hunting dogs in heaven, too. So... in Chuck's words, Go hunt 'em up, Champ... find the birds.....

IN LOVING MEMORY OF SIR CHAMPION V

Look not where I was for I am not there
My spirit is free I am everywhere
In the air that you breathe
In the sounds that you here
Don't cry for me
My spirit is near
I'll watch for you
From the other side
I'll be the one running
New friends by my side
Smile at my memory
Remember in your heart
This isn't the end
It's a brand new start

We say 'I Love You'

As I write this my heart hurts as Chuck is at the vet with our handsome boy Champ, again. God granted the wish I was looking for when it was 'time'. While we know this is the best thing, it hurts so very much, as life without our beautiful dog will never be the same. He's Chuck's best friend, the most wonderful dog I will ever know with his constant wagging tail and gentle brown eyes and Morgan's protector from the day she came home, she was 'his girl'. His body just couldn't keep up with the energy he wanted to have and he will be able to hear, see and run again like he used to... chasing the pheasants he so dearly loved to hunt. So we say, WE LOVE YOU, Champ. You're forever in our hearts and we were so lucky to have you in our lives. Everytime we get to answer the phone at work, your namesake, you will be in our thoughts, CHAMPION. Say 'hi' to Raven for us. LOVE YOU our handsome boy.... our Champers.... our Buster Brown...

Nice weekend

Our weekend consisted of.... Friday morning we went and saw the new baby and bought fireworks, later in the afternoon my parents, my uncle, and brother and sister and nephew came out and we shot a few fireworks and had burgers on the grill. Everytime fireworks we're going to be lit, Cole would put up both had and say 'Watch out.' Chuck's brother and his wife came out in the evening to help us shoot fireworks for Colton... only he was in bed by 8:45 pm. I even had him take a really late afternoon nap and he still was tired at bedtime. Must have been all that running around playing outside that worn him out. Saturday we relaxed at home and we all took a nice long afternoon nap. Sunday we went to the Chahinkapa Zoo in Wahpeton. I had forgotten all about it and my sister mentioned going there and we thought it would be fun. It's such a better zoo than what Fargo has and Cole loved all the animals. He especially liked the ducks and feeding them. Chuck and I liked the monkeys (Cole did too). He now likes to make the monkey sound! It was such a hot morning/day and we stayed for about and hour and a half, went to out to eat and came home and watched a movie while Cole finished the rest of his afternoon nap. It was a really nice day and and a really nice weekend. Hopefully next year (as I had planned to do this year) we'll go the the MN Zoo.

New Niece/New Cousin

Congratulations to my sister Samantha and her husband Ashton on the birth of their new baby girl, Brooklynn Jo born July 3rd. She weighed 6 lbs 2 oz and was 19 inches and looks just like her big brother, Tristen, right down to the nose, hair, chin and eyes! Like I said, just like him! We went and saw them on Friday and she's so tiny and very cute!! Colton called her Brooky and then started called her Cookie. Everytime he looked at her he would say, 'Aaaugh' (as in 'she's so cute'). He was trying to be gentle and rub her head, but that only lasted the first two times and then he got carried away and needed to be moved away from the new baby. CONGRATULATIONS!